(Past)

LANCE jumped and landed just a few feet beside Joaquin. He expected the guy to be in a nervous state but surprisingly, he was quiet and even stealthily listening to the environment. Waiting for a signal that means someone is after them.


"It will take them a while to open the door. We can buy ourselves some time to run."

"You're... not calling the guards?" Joaquin bit his lips. "Other people might be in danger. The prince."

Lance paled. He blinked furiously before gritting his teeth. "I dare them to just do that. He's heavily guarded. All eyes are on him today. They won't be able to come close."


"My father... I don't know where is he. But I think he's not in the hall right now. He doesn't enjoy parties like this."

'Figures. He looks like a party pooper.' Lance shook his head. "Let's go."


It was a cold December and the snow was already an ankle deep outside. Lance felt as though his blue suit is not enough in this nasty temperature. Joaquin must be feeling the same.

"Are you cold?"

Joaquin smacked his mouth like a child. "No. I feel good."

Lance paused for a moment. He thought, 'They're really father and son. Both has quirkiness I can't understand.'

"Lance, are you not afraid of the riot?" he quipped, "You are his eldest son. All of them would want to assassinate you."

"I lived all my life as if I'm dead, anyway." Chill seeped through Lance's clothes. "Nothing is going to change. Even then, my death would probably calm everything."

"That's stupid."

"What's not stupid in this place? Can't even date properly."

"Well, you look like... you used to date the girls in the kitchen."

Lance snickered. "Who wouldn't? They make the best dishes in the world. I feel like, they genuinely care for me. What I eat and how healthy it is."

"Must be really nice."

"Bah." Lance spat. "When the king gets ahold of it, he freaks out like he's afraid I might impregnate them. He either sends them away or scold me 'til I drop them."

"You're a prince after all. You need to be conscious of your move."

"I want to experience love and be loved. Do I need to do it in a 'princely' way?"

Joaquin scrunched his nose. "You're terrible."

"I didn't ask for this life. Personally, I don't want any title. Especially when everyone thinks that the role is not for me."

'A role that is not made for me...' Joaquin lowered his head. 'That's me too. I was born to be like my father. But I'd rather not be anything resembling him.'

"Maybe there's a world out there where I truly belong. A place where I don't need to wear a bowtie for dinner."

"Ah..." Joaquin nodded. "I'd like to be free too."

IT NEVER HAPPENED. As Adarmus remembered how everything changed for Lance, he felt immense remorse and guilt. Lance was able to cheat death countless times before. And the first time that he did it was with his help.

Joaquin couldn't recall anything aside from getting smacked from behind. He lost consciousness in instant. Right at that moment, a fire broke out in the palace.

The newborn was in danger.

Lance heard every scream but he couldn't move his feet. He was knocked to the ground by four unknown people. The dark circle of their eyes and vengeful expression scared him.

Joaquin was left on the snow to die of cold. When Adarmus found him, the stench of Lance's blood made him pause.

Upon gaining back his wit, his son immediately called Lance. When Adarmus didn't answer him, he pleaded.

"Dad, find him. He was just right here before. We came here together— to escape. Someone was after him."

He didn't like the pained expression of his son. It felt as though he's being grated from the inside. Joaquin is his flesh and blood. And under his care, once again, he was hurt.

"Really, Joaquin? I left you for a few minutes and this?" Adarmus contained the fuel in his heart. "How about we should go and have you fixed first? This rebellion has always been anticipated. If it won't happen now, it will still occur in the future."

"But he's not allowed to die!" Joaquin insisted. He tried to walk with shaking legs. He staggered. "He's too young! He didn't fail the people! The king did this!"

"You were almost killed just now, kid. It's clear that they don't intend to hurt other people other than the king's relatives. Maybe this kingdom needs a reform. Maybe when his reign finally end and with no one to succeed the throne, the unfair system will stop."

Joaquin halted on his tracks. He breathed heavily. A look of disappointment clear on his face. "You disgust me. Don't come near me again. Get lost! I don't need a father like you!"

Adarmus never expected that the night would go like this.

He had no choice but to render Joaquin unconscious. Adarmus prioritized his son's safety. Upon searching for Lance's body, he heard about the bandits taking over the capitol.

When he finally found Lance, the kid was already on his deathbed.

Gurgling blood from Lance's throat sprayed onto the snow. Adarmus saw him at the back of an unkempt garden, a large knife is pierced in his gut. The guy's eyes were all open yet unseeing.

He felt a strange tinge of guilt in his chest.

Taking a few steps toward him, Adarmus noticed another person laying beside Lance. It was Sein, the manservant, and he's no longer alive.

Lance flinched. It was like his subconscious heard Adarmus' frantic feet. He exhaled deeply. "Check on Sein. Please... tell me he's still breathing."

Warmth covered Adarmus' ears. He opened his mouth to speak but no words came out. He can hear Lance clearly. Adarmus had always hated this gift. Every blue wolf existing can hear a man's dying words or their wishes. He doesn't know what to do at times like this.

'Do I lie and tell him what he wants to hear?'

"He didn't betray me. Sein did everything so he can protect me. He's not a traitor, sir. And I've never told him how..." Lance can barely open his mouth but that didn't matter to Adarmus. He can hear his thoughts. As if a loud wake up call. "…how thankful I am that he chose me to be his friend."

A single tear left Lance' eyes. Adarmus bent down and held the side of his face. The guy had lost so much blood. Even the slight shaking of his fingers had subsided. The last bit of energy in his body is slowly disappearing. "…what do you want me to do? Tell me what can ease your worries. You're not totally bad. There were people who genuinely liked you in this palace. You were the prince after all."

"The prince..." Silence met the following words. It took a few second before Lance's last sentence came out with a fleeting sigh. "I'll do anything in exchange— please save my brother. Take him out of this cursed place."

Adarmus let go of Lance. His head, filled with chill and numb, tilted to the side as he breathed heavily.

This is one of the reasons why he didn't want Joaquin to fullfil his own role. He would witness countless death and misgivings.

Adarmus thought he was immune enough but the immense pity he felt at the moment lowered down his guard.

He stared deeply at Lance's corpse. Adarmus failed to tell him that the baby whom he thought is his brother was long dead even before Lance got stabbed.

Sein did his best to protect Lance. He did what little does a manservant could do to make Lance survive. He died for him.

And as Sein's unseeing eyes focused solely to Adarmus, he knew what his wish could be without trying to hear his last thought.

'I didn't fail him. He will survive. He will continue to live. He should. Because the prince deserves the world.'

Adarmus pitied him the most.