He looked at her with a pale face. Someone has just sucked a life out of his body.

What is love?


Do I love her?

He asked his heart. But no answer came out. He does not know. What he feels for her? He does not have a slightest idea on what to name these feelings.

He cares about her. He is worried about her. He thinks about her 24/7. He dreams about her. He is happy to see her, to be with her. But what does it all mean? Is it love? His mind which has never experienced such emotions which is making it more confusing.


"I don't know what I feel for you." He replied honestly after contemplating for a long time.

Celeste smiled looking at the ceiling, "at least you are honest." She spoke with a heavy breath, "You can continue". She gave him permission to start over from where he left.


But Edwin felt different. His heart was burdened now. He does not want to touch her anymore. He is afraid to break her. She is too fragile to be played with. "And what if it is not love?" he was in dilemma as he questioned her back. Maybe she could help him in solving this puzzle.

Celeste felt the alcohol wearing off. She was coming back to her senses sooner than she expected. Celeste held him from his neck, "It's okay. It does not matter. But I want it to be you. That's why I will not have regrets".

Edwin held her hand which was holding the back of his neck and separated her from his own body, he covered her body with a quilt quietly making her frown and laid beside her, "Celeste I am not what you think of me. I am a really very….really bad guy." The past events of life started to play like a film in his mind and the bitterness spread all over him, "I don't respect women. I don't have any feelings for them. You are already aware I hate the creature named women."

She started to understand him better. He did not hold himself from slapping her in the past. Why? Because he does not like it when they play with his ego and pride. While she trampled over him badly. Of course, he will never let her go. In the past she became his obsession. He wanted revenge. But in the useless game of revenge he is stuck badly. He cannot get out of it no matter how hard he tries or how much effort he put in.

Celeste turned towards him, "You can change….in fact you are changing and you respect me. You did not in the start but now I never felt like you don't respect me. Even at this moment, you are trying your best to protect me. That's the biggest proff. I do not want anything more. Whatever happened in the past, we should not let it ruin our relationship now….our today". Being drunk, she was literally begging him. She craves to be loved. She craves to be the obsession of someone. She craves it to be with him. To be him with her.

He sighed deeply, "I am not sure". He shook his head in defiance. His heart was betraying him as he was deeply getting affected by her words. But the responsibility and the sense of protection outweigh the emotional tsunami inside.

Celeste sat on the top of him, and looked deeply in his eyes, stating her willingness, "but I am sure". She started to kiss him once again, continuing the session.

After a lot of time and confusion, whe  he could no longer control the desire, he finally entered her body.

Edwin cursed, "F**k".

Celeste is a virgin…. A virgin till some seconds ago and now he took something precious from her which a jerk like him does not deserve. Due to the pain, a drop of tear rolled down from the corner of her eye. He stopped to look at her with the eyes wide open. What has he done?? He never experienced this before. Whether it was a good choice or bad he does not know.

A smile suddenly plastered on her lips. "Its okay, because it is you". She tried to put him at ease. He wanted to give her assurance and does not want to break the trust she has. But the damage was already caused there was no way to undo it. He fulfilled her sexual demands and desires all night. When they were done, he helped her in cleaning up her body and embraced her. "I don't know if it was right or wrong. I will try to be a better man for you".  He promised her, for her he can try….actually it was worth trying. Tonight he was, sure too. His feelings for her were something special, which he cannot neglect, which always made him longed for her.

She also wanted him to be a better man as soon as possible and a good son. When she saw his father his eyes were sad and lonely. He was longing to see his son, to talk to him like a man to man. But he is not willing to open his heart, which she wanted him to do.

In the morning, the bright sunray strikes with the window and comes inside, falling on their sleepy faces. She frowned because it was disturbing her. Edwin was the first one to awake, he looked at her innocent face with half sleepy eyes, when he saw her in his embrace there was a sense of accomplishment, a victorious feeling arose in his heart. It was the best feeling to wake up with her by the side. Which he wants to experience again and again. He is never gonna get fed up.

Edwin put her head lightly on the pillow and turned to see her beautiful face. She looked so peaceful. He kissed her rosy lips which made her whimper. Her body was aching badly and even a slight movement was enough to generate the wave of pain. She stretched to relax the aching body, but suddenly realized something was off.  

Celeste opened her eyes. She glanced at the surroundings while narrowing the eyes to get a better view. The first thing she found was someone laying beside her. With hesitation and a thumping heart she moved her face towards him, who was now resting his head on the hand observing her with a deep interest. She was feeling dizzy and her head was hurting badly because she was hangover.

In a reflex, Celeste was about to scream but the incident from last night flashed making her swallow back the screams everything. When she saw that it is Edwin, her senses went numb.

She was so embarrassed to face him, the boldness from the last night vanished as the alcohol wore off. She hid in a blanket, it was hard to face the reality. She closed her eyes and bit her bottom lips as she cursed loudly in the mind.

"Are you sober now?" he asked a hiding Celeste, getting amazed by the whole situation.

"Can you go out for a while?" She ignored his question and requested from under the sheets. "Why? I am not going anywhere". Edwin on the other hand, settled into a more comfortable position.

He laughed at the realization, "Are you shy now? You were the one who seduced me last night. Now, suddenly don't change from a lioness to a cat. It is hard for me to digest it". He was going to tease her. More than her imagination and one more thing, why the hell is he putting all the blame on her? He played an equal role.

She clenched her teeth under the cover but no excuse popped up in her mind. It was an awkward situation.

She was not going to come out soon. He is aware of it. Edwin gripped hard on the quilt and pulled it down from her face. She struggled hard to cover her naked body. But he is far more stronger than her as a result her efforts went in vain.

Celeste was looking everywhere else but his eyes. Edwin found her so adorable. He was getting addicted to her. She is a drug which he had for once. Now he has experienced being with her at night it was going to be hard to resist in the future. He is in the toughest position.

"Please". She begged one more time. Her puppy eyes melted his heart. Edwin inhaled a fair amount of air, "Okay. I am waiting for you. Come out after refreshing up:.

He jumped out of the bed and sat in the small living room that was inside the hotel and ordered a dress for her.

Celeste took a shower and saw her dress was ripped from different spots. It was not wearable at all. She was contemplating on what to do when he knocked  on the door and put a dress on the floor like a gentleman, "I am leaving  the clothes for you. Change into them".

She opened the door and picked up a dress and changed into them. She was hesitant to face him but also cannot run away from reality. Celeste held a hem of her dress and went to the living room. She was scratching the part beneath her ear. "Let's go and eat something".

Celeste held the sleeve of his shirt. "Are you angry at me?"

He looked in her eyes, "Why are you regretting now?"

"No". She did not hesitate even for a second.

"Then why will I be angry?" He cupped her cheeks and kissed the tip of her nose.