And fare thee weel, my only love,

And fare thee weel a while!


And I will come again, my love,

Thou' it were ten thousand mile.

________________


Sinclair

I told you, didn't I?


Sinclair made the most stupid mistake of her life despite her warnings.

She trusted.

She loved.

She fell.

Nicholas Stafford was not there to catch her. She should have known better. Her problem was, she gave precedence to the chemicals emitting from her brain whenever he was around.

Fuck attraction! Look where it landed her. She was once again back to that old box questioning her worth. After years of self-therapy, fear had crept over her once more. She was as unbalanced as she was when the people she cared for the most left her at a tender age. She was definitely worthless.

Stop! You are not!

The last text she received from him was three days ago. He said there was a family emergency. Yeah, right. She was sure he used that same exact excuse before.

The fuck I care!

Maybe after graduation, she would consider moving to a different city. Better yet, maybe it was time to relocate to her aunt in the USA. There must be a suitable school there needing a teacher.

Sell the house, pack her things, and never look back.

She could. Nothing was holding her back. But what if...

No. She had decided not to continue living in what-ifs anymore.

Professor Hayes, his substitute since Wednesday, gave them assignments for the weekend.

That would keep her busy then. Plus, her thesis and three odd jobs should be enough to keep her mind off of him.

Sinclair was the first one out of the room after class and went straight to her locker.

It was Friday. She would be at the laundry service until 9 PM. After that, the diner.

"Hi," a male voice greeted from behind.

She swiveled her head so fast she thought she would have whiplash. Shit! She got it bad. Not him. Some dude from trigonometry class.

She waited for him to speak politely. He looked like a jock with his blond hair and pale blue eyes. Tall and boyishly attractive. Not her type. Aware she was not his usual type either.

She may be impaired but she was not stupid.

"Yes," she arched her brow. Losing patience. She had jobs waiting.

"I'm Paul. From trigo?" He held out his hand for a handshake. Out of courtesy, she did her part. Shook his rough sweaty palm then let go.

He was giving her the creeps.

"I'm Sinclair. How can I help you?" She tried not to sound on edge. Couldn't completely hide her reaction.

He coughed to hide his amusement at her response. "I was wondering if we could go out for coffee?" He flipped his hair and gave her a wide smile. It was supposed to entice her, maybe his style worked with other girls but all it did was make her uncomfortable.

"Thanks but I can't." Was her firm answer.

He seemed surprised. She guessed this was the first time he was turned down. And a deaf person at that.

The jock's smile widened. Great! He was now in the assumption she was playing hard to get. A stupid idea she might make a good conquest. Not happening.

"Maybe next time then, beautiful?" He showed his full charm by flashing a wide smile. Still not working for her.

"We'll see. Got to go. See you around, Paul." She was out of the building fast.

She knew his kind. Her body shuddered, recalling the hard glint in his eyes despite his outward charm.

They always said the eyes were the window to one's soul. His was cold, full of dark malice. Of cruelty.

Sinclair remembered the men her mom brought home. They had the same look as his.

It was better to stay out of his radar. She was done with men, already learned her lesson.

***

His friends didn't come back to buy their usual coffee either.

At 2 AM, she could not fathom her desperation to see them again. They

always came for coffee at 1. Maybe needed the refreshment after clubbing. Odd. Not one of the guys smelled of hard liquor.

Time had passed. There was an expensive car parked outside earlier but she was certain it was not one of them.

She sighed. She had to get over this infatuation. He may have given her her first and only orgasm, however, it was a normal thing for him. He wouldn't even fuck her properly. All his bullshit about waiting was just an act. He just wanted a taste and when it was too boring for him, he left.

She was tired. Emotionally and physically. Two more hours. Suppressing her yawn, she went back to her books.

Groaning at her lack of concentration, she reached for her tasteless coffee.

Please help me forget him.

________________

An Admirer

He liked that Asian girl. Been watching her from afar for days.

Her body was lithe and her curves were just right. She was petite. It was okay. He preferred his sex slaves that way. The more helpless, the better.

Would she scream if he whipped her with a cane? Or flogged her? He could tie her up and do anything to her body. Even shared her with his friends.

He got hard from thinking about it. The anticipation was killing him. His latest slave, a fifteen-year-old, sweet girl, couldn't take much of his punishment and died in his basement. He needed a new one to break in. And Sinclair would do.

It was time to do some research about her. The rumors said she lived alone. Had no living relatives. Not even a cat. Or dog. Good. That would bring no complications if she disappeared.

He couldn't afford to damage his reputation for the slave's pussy. His father would disown him.

Had to be more careful and rely on their organization for procurement. Nonetheless, he was glad he made a move today. Soon, she would happily be choking on his cock.

His new pet. Very soon.

The street lights couldn't hide the evil smirk on his face.

He would make his move as soon as he received the green light from his boss.

_______________

Sinclair

When could she have another chance at restful sleep?

The last time was...

She shook her head to dispel the memories. It should not have happened in the first place. She had no experience and she didn't satisfy him.

His disappearance spoke volumes. It was no use dwelling on what could never be. He had been gone for a week. Maybe for good.

It was late Tuesday night, she would have classes tomorrow. No familiar cars on site. Just as well.

Tonight and for the past nights, only one same car was parked away in the same spot. Odd. The driver never showed his face. Not even once.

Whoever was inside never visited the diner to buy anything. The man must be waiting for someone.

Some patrons were in tonight. She got up from the counter to serve them coffee.

Working here had become too mundane it drove her crazy.

Five more weeks, Sinclair.

If she admitted it to herself, she missed him but he was not there.

Breakfast delivery in the morning had also stopped. Just as well, she had no appetite.

Her longing for him made her so fucking angry with herself.

Scratching her wrist, hidden by her sleeves, her body jolted at the sting. Shit! Looked at what he made her do.

But it was nobody's fault but hers.

Sinclair should never have hoped for something more.

***

She dreaded attending the last period for the day, he might be there and she didn't know how to act if she saw him again.

How she wished she could drop this particular major. Regardless, the thought of staying one more semester at uni at her own expense made her grit her teeth and persevere.

You will be out of here in a few weeks, Sin.

As luck would have it or since she was the unluckiest person in the world, he came in.

Handsome as sin as ever. Dressed in his usual style that made women swoon at his elegant masculinity, he dominated the room.

Professor Stafford started his class with the usual exam. She avoided his eyes at all costs. Back on her usual seat, which was in the last row of the bleachers, she was far from his tempting form though not enough.

She listened to his lectures like her life depended on them and took notes. Never participated and never talked to anyone. She kept glancing at her watch. Almost time.

"Ms. Yuan, please stay after class. We need to discuss the result of your exam." She stiffened at his request. Damn!

She didn't answer. Her gaze was sullen when she finally looked at him.

His dark eyes were serious. A guarantee of punishment if she defied him.

Waiting, she didn't move from her spot. He walked over when the room was empty bar them.

"Sinclair," she hated his voice. It was velvet over honey and it made her shiver.

"Look at me, sweet." She hated that too. He had no right to give her pet names.

"Is there anything we need to discuss, professor?" He flinched at her cold tone. Good.

"Yes, my sweet. I should explain..."

"No need. I understand." She got up and gathered her things. Enough of this.

"Sin," he coaxed. His voice was soft.

"Just leave me alone, sir." Her books and laptop felt heavy but her heart was heavier.

"Sinclair, I promise to..."

"Leave me the fuck alone! Don't make promises you can't keep." This time she couldn't stop the tears. They fell from her eyes to wash away her pain.

His dark gaze looked remorseful. He was so close and his delicious scent was playing havoc on her senses.

"I have to go," she whispered, glancing away to hold her composure.

"Sinclair, let me explain, please." She couldn't give in to him and be vulnerable once more.

"You can't just walk back into my life, professor. I won't let you hurt me again!"

Before he could stop her, she ran out and didn't bother to pass by her locker. Her hands frantically wiped her face, ignoring the glances of people she passed by.

The old shoes she wore today made scruffy noises on the cobbled pavements whilst she walked home.

By the time she reached her front door, she was sobbing. As soon as she got inside, she threw her things on the sofa and ran to the toilet where she heaved the contents of her stomach.

There was not much. Soon, she was retching bile while crying.

She felt warm hands on her back, soothing her, firm long digits pulling her hair out of the way.

Fuck! She didn't want him to see her like this. She tried to get away but he held her tighter.

Her knees were shaky, he helped her up and pulled her to his chest. Soot and all.

She sobbed harder. Why can't he just go away?!

"Shhh, sweetheart. I'm sorry. I'm sorry, Sin. I have a lot of explaining to do. If you will just listen." Nicholas whispered in her hair. His arms caged her. There was no mistaking the pain in his voice.

Let him explain.

Controlling her emotions, she considered his words and nodded.

Feeling a bit calm, she stepped out of his arms to wash her face and brush her teeth. Twice. She hated it when anxiety attacked her.

His eyes never left her, scanning her every inch of her body.

"Why are there fucking bandages on your wrist, Sinclair!?"

The flash of anger in his voice startled her. He was beside her in an instant, holding her forearms to check them himself. His jaw ticked. His nose flared.

"Who hurt you? Tell me." He demanded.

"Nicholas..." She hesitated.

How do I tell him?

_______________